I am busy watching one of the new episodes of Glee where they feature Billy Joel (See YouTube video at end of post).  The cast have just sung Honesty and it has touched a nerve.

I have been thinking about the importance of honesty just recently.  We all fall into the habit of

sacrificing ourselves to the people we love rather than being open and honest and telling people what we want or what we think.  As a result we find that life runs away and we end up doing things we don’t like or being in situations we don’t want to be in.  Or perhaps just ending up being someone we don’t want to be.

There is a very small handful of people I can be honest with – in fact I think there is 1 I can be totally
honest with and another who comes a close second, And these 2 relationships have had a huge impact on my life. They offer a listening ear without judgement and total acceptance.
The people who love us should be able to accept us for who and what we are – without judgement.

We tend to not tell the truth in order to keep the peace.  But the reality is that in doing so, we are hiding much of the discontent that builds up in our lives and relationships.  Which invariably ends up manifesting itself as anger or hatred.  And the result of this is that the opportunity for understanding and being heard is lost.

Yes, you run the risk of not getting the reaction you wanted or expected.  But those who are close to you should be able to respect the truth and your feelings.  Without honesty there is no trust.  And without trust there is nothing to build a relationship on.

Honesty is not easy to share or hear.  We also don’t have to agree with others.  But we do need to respect everyone’s feelings and viewpoints – it allows for a relationship to grow.  And unfortunately to end if that what the truth requires.

If someone cannot deal with the truth, then it is time to move on and create space for like-minded people who are not going to judge you and will accept you for who you are.  And love you for who and what you are.

It takes a huge amount of courage to be honest. Not to mention the right timing. Honesty can be delivered with compassion and empathy, but those acts of kindness also belong to ourselves. By being honest, you are being compassionate and kind to yourself and that, is the most important thing.

I would be interested to hear your viewpoints on this subject so go on and leave a message……

Lanthie Ransom

13 thoughts on “Honesty

  1. A friend and I have just debated this. Is a valid point as both of us have recently hurt someone close to us by being honest with our feelings. In the end we need to do what is right for us and the situations we are in.

  2. Honesty is always the best policy in my eyes but you also have to know how to deliver the message at the right time. If you want people to be upfront and honest with you, then why shouldn't you be the same with them?

    I'd rather be hurt knowing the full truth than being left in the dark….

  3. Very nice, thoughtful piece.
    I'm usually accused of being too honest. How can you be too honest? If someone asks me a direct question, then I'm going to answer them. If you don't want to hear the answer, don't ask the question, that's my attitude.

  4. Always be as honest as possible, even though it might be a bit hurtful to both parties involved. Better to air things out than to live a lie to one's self, and to someone else, if you know what I mean. Good luck with your decision on this matter.

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