I’m Rich, I’m Rich

A funny thing happened on Wednesday afternoon whilst I was doing the school run. 

I’m driving along and my cellphone rings. So I answer it (on my car kit) and it is Beatrice from my bank.

She wants to know why I have so much money sitting in a non-interest bearing account and can she open a Marketlink account for me (where I will earn interest!).

So i ask her if she is speaking to the right Mrs  – my mother-in-law and I share the same initials.  She of course confirms my ID number, date of birth etc and we establish that I am indeed the correct person.


So I ask her how much money is sitting in the account – and of course it is a small fortune – R74,000 to be exact (Around US$10,000).

Now if you know me – you will know that I am anal with money – I know where every single cent is and where it goes. 

So I scratch my head trying to think where I have this much money sitting around – especially seeing  as though I am overdrawn and my credit card is very sick.  She confirms it is a normal transaction account that has no ATM card linked.

Now there is a history of me and banks – I dislike them almost as much as I dislike the taxman.  They are all out to F&*k you out of every cent you have.  I have survived most of my married life without anything more than a low-end transaction account – the one with the cheapest fees.  I have full signing powers on hubby’s account (with personal banker and all the bells and whistles) so I have very little need for my own.  About a year ago I finally admitted that I should open my own account – in case hubby snuff’s it in the middle of the night and I need access to money type of thing!

So I opened a cheque account with credit card etc etc – bank was instructed to close my old account and transfer all monies etc over and link it all to my ATM card and Internet banking profile. 

Now I Have loads of accounts linked to my ATM card and Internet banking profile – hubby’s accounts / kids accounts / 4 of my companies accounts / credit cards / savings etc.

Anyway – Beatrice asks me to pop into the bank so we can discuss this money (which I insist I don’t have).  She was off yesterday so I went to see her this morning – she phoned to make sure I was coming in.

So off I rush to the bank at lunch time today – as she has called again this morning to remind me – this cannot be a hoax and maybe, just maybe it might be mine…..

So I sit with her and she opens up the account and shows me the balance – goes into the history and this money has been lying in the account for years.  (It is not like someone transferred money into my account by accident and I am rich for a day!)

I sat there is disbelief – Beatrice is in hysterics at this point – she thinks I am one of the funniest people she has ever served.  She cannot believe I had forgotten / did not know I had this money.

So Beatrice kindly opens a new moneymarket account for me and transfers the money in and I leave the bank with a smile on my face – perhaps I can take hubby out for lunch! (Perhaps he will let me buy a plane ticket so I can go see my son in Dubai for a few days!)

Of course as I type this post – I am back to being poor again – overdraft is looking better and I can finally use my credit card again!

(Note to Son no 2 – Your Father did not agree to the plane ticket – In case you thought I would be there at the crack of dawn tomorrow!)